How could anyone get used to this...

I don't understand how some of my friends are just so used to their husbands being on travel that it's no big deal to them. I never thought much about it when it was just the two of us and he was gone so much...but now with kids I really notice his absence. The kids do too.

It's weird how on any other morning they wouldn't even wonder where daddy was...but today they woke up and the first thing they asked me was where he was. They don't really understand days yet (though they do know what they all are!) so it's harder to explain that daddy will be back on Thursday.

I guess eventually we all will get used to it...it will become routine...and they won't ask anymore. I love that they miss him...but I hate that they miss him. I miss him too........ come home safely BD.

Happy Today...

I was tagged by Suzanna to post things that make me happy.

• Sunny days
• long strong hugs
• kiddo kisses
• free refills
• good ice cream
• vacation days
• new baby smell
• my scrapbooks
• when my family visits
• when my family leaves
• shopping
• warm summer rain
• new flowers blooming
• butterflies
• giggles

what makes you happy??

Stampin Up!

I did my first EVAH home party....had SU!. My friend from Montgomery came up to do it for me. She was great!! Of course we haven't had rain in weeks...and it poured....but we needed the rain anyway.

We had a great time...the projects were fun and easy...and everyone enjoyed making them...or if they didn't..they didn't tell me!!

I even thought about becoming a demo....make a little extra cash so I don't feel so badly about buying scrapbook stuff and get the stamps I want for a discount....Damn you Adam and Eve for making me have a conscience....

maybe if I put it out there for all the world to see.....

then it will help me....cause keeping it to myself it is not getting me the result that I need...

Dear God
Please come into my heart and help me
Help me to temper my actions and my words
So that they will not be hurful or raw
Help me to understand and heal the pain in others
Rather than cause it
Help me
To help myself be a better person
In Jesus' name I pray
Amen

First Time For Everything

Well today for the first time since the kids..BD had to go on a business trip. Somehow we've been lucky enough to dodge that bullet for the past 4 years, but today was the first.

The first time I had to hear my TT#1 scream that he wanted his daddy back. That about broke my heart. He finally realized that daddy would be back, after explaining that it was just like mommy came back after her trip to the airport.

Tonight will be the first time that the boys go to bed without daddy giving hugs and kisses. He's going to call and say goodnight to them. I'm sure that he will miss the hugs and kisses just as much as the boys will.

This will be the first time that I am alone with the boys for a long period of time. BD's never spent the night away from the boys since they've been old enough to remember. There was a time in 2003 when me and TT#1 stayed in Philly for a month without BD when BD's grandma died and I had to help with the estate.

I am going to have to cook dinner....if you know me....then you know that I don't cook....at least not very well.

The next few days is going to be a challenge for us all.....

Open letter to the sylist who did my hair last night....

Sweetie....

Don't ask your client what they want to do to their hair...and then tell them that you don't want to do that and suggest something completely different. If I wanted my hair colored instead of permed I would have told you I wanted it colored.

No one is interested in how many bad haircuts you have given this week...and I am especially not interested when you are holding a pair of scissors in one hand and my hair in the other.

That being said, you really need to get a ruler and learn how much hair 1-2 inches is. When someone wants at the most 2 inches cut off...and you cut off 3-4...chances are they aren't going to be happy.

People are not comforted by the fact that you have to read the instructions on the perm box "as a refresher".

It's not a good thing when your client knows how to fan out the perm papers and you ask them how they did it so easily.

You really shouldn't make disparaging comments about other races or ethnicities while you have a client in your chair. And you really shouldn't be making those comments *to* the client sitting in your chair.

You don't ask your client how many children they have...and then ask them if they are "mixed" or "all-white". It's none of your business if they are purple with green spots and pink stripes.

But thank you very much for the complimentary eyebrow wax. That was about the least you could do for me after having to deal with you for 2 1/2 hours.

Thanks..

I keep waiting...

I keep waiting for the day when I have a great epiphany that allows me to discern the meaning of my existence....and I'm still waiting.

I don't completely believe in predestination...we do have free will after all. But I do believe that we each have a purpose on earth. I just don't know what the hell my purpose is. I fee like I'm going through the motions....allowing others to believe that I have a clue. I feel like a phony.

All my friends think I'm so self-assured...so confident. I'm freaking out inside...on a daily basis. Some days it feels like I'm hanging by a thread and at any moment.....SNAP! It's going to break and I'm going to be hurtled into the unknown.

Some day I'll know what's going on...but until then....I'll be sitting in the corner...muttering to myself and rocking myself....

Project: Soldier Post

My family has adopted a young soldier in Iraq. I wanted to create a special album for him offering words of encouragement and support. Just something to let this young man know that what he is doing is appreciated and that he is cared about. There are so many over there who have lost faith in the US due to lack of support...I don't understand why we can't support our men and women even if you don't support the reason they are there...it's a mind boggler for me.

Anyway..here is what I want to do...

have someone from every state, province, whatever....get a postcard highlighting your area...write a message to the boys and girls over in the sand box....put that postcard in the mail to me...and I will create a kickin' album with all of them and mail it to him. Does that sound like something that you would like to take part in? If you would...please email me at

Project Soldier Post

Don't you dare!!!

Don't you dare tell me that my fears about North Korea are irrational and uneducated.

There is nothing irrational about fearing that we might have WWIII break out before my children's first acne break out.

I cannot stand it when people feel the need to negate your feelings by telling you that you are being irrational. That sounds like such a cop out to make yourself feel better about NOT being afraid.

I have every right to be afraid of some lunatic on the other side of the ocean who would like nothing better than to put a feather in his cap after starting a battle between the US and North Korea. He sees it as a show of power...he can take the US head on.

So I don't see my fears as irrational....quite the opposite...I see your lack of concern as irrational.